Friday, May 20, 2005
reality
i wish i could turn back time...change my mindset change some choices...change some people...denise can u like snap back into reality! look at ur grades! what were u thinking! You did not study and yet u think u could do well! what the hell is wrong with u ...procrastinating procrastinating not doing hmwork now look at ur L1R5! its hiddeous! and what happened to ur emaths! cheryl beat u! why!!!! and OMG ur LITERATURE! WAD THE HELL IS WRONG WITH U! why...... and how could that have happened.....i really regret it....So u think ur so smart do u..no need to study lah! flunk again and again lah!
i should really bring my own standards down and work much much harder..looks like i'll have to sacrifice some things in life....and study..its for my own good....felt like crying today....but what was i thinking...i did not study...wad could i have expected! well mostly i damn angry at myself...and no one else....well perhaps some idiots..but its not their fault.. why did u expect As and Bs when i got... DENISE WAKE UP! ur not in dreamland! face reality! or u might not even get into poly! at least i have some friends who are there for me...and i'll make sure to be there for them too....sometimes i need a reminder though hahas..we decided to make pacts! were gonna get at least a C6 for chinese and were gonna tell each othe rif we have a major prob and bea...ahem...another is to get into top 10 or the class..yeah i know its kinda impossibles...er i mean unlikely(sounds more positive) but if theres a will theres a way! and some offered to teach me...yay thank yew! i love u guys man!i studied for 4h 45min today for chinese no distractions! well that was cos i was in tuition class...but it was self study all the way! yeah! talk about determination! hope it lasts though..ehh....think positive think positive! wo shi hua ren wo hui jiang hua yu! (quoted frm jn)random event of the day...in sec 3/8 class roomlittle itchy fingers nise was playing with the bead like curtains hanging from the door...nise: oops! (a string of bead was plucked off and she quicky put it behind her back as kim frm 3/8 turned to look!)AAA people: hahahahaha...(some juz stare blurly not knowing what happened)kim: heh i saw something dangling behind u)nise: heheh...another random event:literature paper came nise: (juz stared...din know how to respond)another random event:GG paper...nise: shit lah cant u juz gimme 1.5 arks more to pass! (looks around...pple worse than her)nise: oooh....(wonders how come the improvement...relfects back on the last min studying...still wonders... then..) oooh..(again)dunno hu: eh add 5 marksnise:(omg i passed! 1st time in my sec sch life for gg...still wonders why...decides to shut uo so no one knows and feels bad)however in the end could not control and told some pple hu she cannot remember...another random eventnise goes: IDIOT! AHHHHRRRRGGGGGHHHH!another random important event! denise goldfish has not eaten for 2 days! denise go and feed them!!!!another random event:after recieving Lit papernise sings:
Here I am, once again I’m torn into pieces,
can't deny it, can't pretend Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
(looks down and shuts up for quite some time..her eyes burn..)
drama drama man!
Hur Hur.
9:47 PM
