guess i'll update again...

truth is..
these few dasy ive been
sleeping my life away..
just read jon's blog
the thing in common..
BAD SLEEPING HABITS!
it 2.17 am..
im still not asleep..i'd prob sleep at 3
anyway..that bad...ive been doing that for a few days now...
and ive been waking up at 2 or 3 the next day unless i have something on..
and ive been becoming real late for stuff lately...
i dilly dally too much before leaving the house
its either that or i didnt get enough sleep the previous day

i feel like..
life is so stagnant now..
everyone is like doing their own stuff now..
be it ocip or cca or slacking or church

church..havent been there for weekday mass in a long while
i still owe the big guy a rosary and a mass
oh what a wretched girl i am
becoming so lazy and eating so much choc hahaha

its an evil yet wonderful thing chocolate

sorry anne
i forgot to tell u i had tuition today so i couldnt go for mass
i really intended to go

i need to go to church..
to the ado
and spend some time with him

i used to be so happy..
just going to church..
by myself..
just to go for mass..

but now..
im just
plain lazy.

heh..

what happened denise!!!
u never even study...
u just sleep ur life away ahha
and waste it.. just having fun..
watching youtube also..
anime...
korean shows..
ahhh!

i always say this at night..
but then..its time to sleep..
im tired..
say my catena.

then good night God..
i;ll talk to you another time...
im tired
see you tml

im a wrteched wretched girl!
i bet i'll do it later..
the same thing again and again every night..
i feel i need some words of wisdom..
haha actually know
i just miss the time when log was just formed and jude used to come in and teach us stuff and help us understand and discover new things about God.
i forgot much..

then i would share what i learnt with my sec sch friends.

and i was happy..
so were my friends.
and he was happy.


if only the world was much more simple..
like stacie oricos song simple.

what happened to my zeal for God..
i really think i need that log retreat..

and a good talk with someone

I CANT WAIT FOR TML!
THE SEVEN OUTING!
without yilin :(
then..
we will talk..
like the old times..


just wanna say one thing


I LOVE HAPPY FEEET!
esp the amigos! ahhaha


i wonder if loggers and stoners still go for weekday mass...

i wonder how im supposed to do moring praise for Log retreat!
how!!! i just lost all my zeal! and kinda drifted..
from him...
how..
how..
i know how..
but its not so easy..
how how how how howh ow
im tired..
sheesh..

im a disappointment to myself...

cant pray
cant help people
cant be bothered
cant sing that well
cant act that well
cant play guitar that well
cant even study
cant understand physics or maths or lit or econs or GP
cant run
cant cook
cant listen
cant advise people
cant console people
cant help people
cant read for long periods
cant do what im supposed to
cant understand
cant figure things out
cant solve things
cant do anything to make things better
cant say what i wanna say
cant say the right things
cant do anything good
cant think for myself
cant depend on myself
cant let people depend on me
cant learn chinese!
cant run for long periods!
cant jump high!
cant swim
cant dance
cant plan
cant lead
cant follow
cant pray...

hate myself...

nah too strong..
if i did i just kill myself haha
and then i would go to hell
and id hate God for making me this way too
but i know he gave me free will

thus.

i cant hate myself
because i love God..
but still i cant pray
cant help people
cant cant cant
cant even try to do something now to help myself
stupid girl..

u know..
nothing....

i tried to undertand myself just now..
but i cant..
heh.

Hur Hur.
2:15 AM