So im supposed to be studying.
But the drive just died. like that. Bam!
Physics and econs can die.
you will make me happier this way.
maths was very..i think i may get an E or even a D if everything goes superwell-ish.
i just hope not to fail.

I came across your blog. Because you put it on ur msn nick haha

and then i realised.
why u so cool. haha
you get to do all the things i wanna do.
but you do it so much better than me.
am i wasting my time here in cj?

i want :
to draw -like you
to paint -like you
to write -maybe i write better than you ahhaa but who knows
to compose songs -like you
to play the guitar -omg if i can be like u..thats crazy

and most importantly.
I want to sing. -well you dont so that doesnt really count.
haha
i havent been singing.
i think i might have gotten worse.


and i wanna do gigs! like you! like omg hahaa


but all that..i have to compromise.
for study.

great.

Maybe i'll take a year off to do nothing.
after As ahhaa
nahhhh

Who am i refering to? you will never know! unless you make a super wild guess.
haha


I WANNA LEARN THE PIANO!
LIKE I TRIED IT AND IM SO BAD AT IT!
AND SO SLOW! LIKE EVEN THO I KNOW SOME THEORY NOW AND PLAY GUITAR AND STUFF I STILL SUCK AT PIANO!

LIKE HOW COME BECAUSE ADAM PALYS PIANO HE CAN LEARN GUITAR SO FAST AND IS NOW BETTER THAN ME!! LIKE WAHHHH
WHY CANNOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND..SIAN.





you know.
my range totally sucks.
i have like a singing blind spot. where at this key its like in the middle of my falsetto and normal voice.. that when i sing it air just comes out! like wtf!

and when i sing high my voice like becomes so thin!!! like how can then so soft! like.. how..like how...
im a loser!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
like so many pple can reach it but i cant! and like its not solid like unlike how u use ur diaghphram..like i dunno how to spell that and i dun like that!! like!! wth! wheres the power and the ability to control emotions when ur voice is so thin so like how t make it sound freaking nice if u cant even control ur voice then u zao sia...like omG! im so angry and my stupid one note disability.

like omg ! im a bimbo!
its not funny!

this is spontaneoous blogging! like no one is talking to me at home so i talk to the friggin comp! like wtf! denise ur a damn loser.


and i like.
i hate this bout me and that bout me and everything bout me. like im so unhappy cos i cause myself to be unhappy cos i just like to find fault with myself that im becoming a bimbo and this isnt making things any better.

ok.
relax.


AND I CANT DRAW FACES FOR NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I CAN ONLY DRAW CARTOON FACES!!!!! LIKE WHY!!!!

WHY!!!

YOU SEEE!





LIKE THESE 3 ARE MY BEST PICS AND LIKE ONLY PROPER ONES THAT ARENT SCRIBBLING AND LIKE I DREW THAT ALL WITHIN A MONTH IN SEC 4!

LIKE THATS 2 YEARS AGO!! AND I HAVENT BEEN DRAWING SINCE!!! THERES NO TIME!!
NO TIME FOR GOD OSO!! LIKE OMG!
SUCH AND UNHAPPY LIFE..

i realise i did the top 2 when i was waiting for my Olevel results haha

and i so dun wanna be a cartoonist.
why all cartoon!!! i wanna draw still life stuff.
like disheveled buildings and abstract stuff and i wanna learn how to add colour!!!
like i dunno how to add colour!!! everthing is blakc and hwite!!!!

but colour pencil is freaking ugly and flat looking.
so i wanna learn how to paint!

and i wanna do sculpturing you know..
like...
WHY DO I WANNA DO SO MANY THINGS NOW! WHEN I SHOULD JUST SHUT UP AND STUDY AND GET GOOD GRADES AND THEN DO ALL THAT I WANT COS I GET GOOD GRADES AND MY PARENTS WILL LOVE ME MORE NAD TRUST ME AND BE SO PROUD OF ME THAT THEY LET ME DO ALL THAT I WANT AND SUPPORT ME.

OK THATS LIKE AVERY VERY GOOD REASON TO STUDY HARD.

ok
GO DENISE GO! AHAHHAAASA



and i wanna say..
may you rest in peace thaddaeus.

=(

Im so glad im not your friend.
or i would have burst to tears.
but then i found out.
you live across the street.
and my family knows yours.

all the more i think that...
i should have been your friend.
so that i could have grieved for you even more
because. you deserve it.








Imagine if your good friend died.
=(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
wehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

if cheryl wong died..choi!!!
wehhhhhhhhhh
i'll be super super super sad.
hahahaha ok i dun wanna say anymore names..im making myself emo.



and i just wanna say..
sorry. to you.
if u realise its you that is.
i dunno what came over me.

Hur Hur.
11:28 PM