everything seems to bore my nowadays!

i need to like read the purpose driven life or something..

heck.

BUY FROM ME CJ POST PROM TIX. $20 (NEGOTIABLE)

it was good ot catch up with all of the seven..like ALL OF THEM!
like really
never laughed so hard for so long....

and jehanne got damn drunk and started called so many pple to tell them how much she treaured themm..but somehow she didn't scare me ahha. she was just amusing.
today was sweet.
really
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PJ! =)

i love each and everyone one of u guys.

and i dunno..when i got home i just like felt like talking to many people.. just wnated to talkt to many many pple...and i was so happy to talk to so many pple..
like i said HELLO! and stuff and it was all in caps to show my happiness and excitied ness..

i dunno. i just really miss my friends..and wanna talk to them..after hearing what jn siad..
i really dont want to lose any of my friends. like really. i treasure u guys alot.
alot alot. alot alot alot. I HAVE NO REAL SIBLING! I ONLY HAVE U GUYS U KNOWWWWW!!!


YAR.

and my siblings are like disappearing...poof! whyyyyyyyyyyy boooooooooooooooooo i hate As i HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE IT!

IF I SAID I HATE U ON MSN I DONT MEAN IT! HAHAHAHAAH
ITS A BAD WORDDDDD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD WORD...THAT I PICKED UP FROM LING..
LING CAN U DONT USE IT...ITS NOT NICE! I DONT LIKE TO SAY I HATE U TO PPLE..COS I REALLY DONT AND I KNOW U DONT TOOO AND THE WORD HATE MAKES PPLE VERY VERY VERY VERY SAD...I DONT LIKE HATE. I DONT LIKE IT ALOT! OK. I SHALL NOT SAY IT! UNLESS I REALLY MEAN IT! COS ITS REALLY NOT NICE! DONT SAY IT OK!!! NOT NICE...NOT NICE..........



YAR.


uh.


yar.


uh.


i lost my train of thought.


I LIKE LOST MY CHOCO DIGESTIVES BISCUITS TODAY IN THE LOIBRARY!! WHYYY AFTER I TOOK SO LONG TO FIND IT! RAHHH RAHHHH.



I REALLY LOVE ALL MY FRIENDSS!!!!! AND IF I LIKE DUN TREAT U WELL ENOUGH U MUST TELL MEEEEE OK!! OK! OK! OK! OK! OK! OK! OK! AH! OK!


YAR.


AND LIKE
WHEN JN WAS SANE...SHE ASKED ME IF I SOMETHING GREATENESS...
CANT RMB..

LIKE WE WERE TAKING ABOUT OUR FUTURE..

AND I HAVE ALOT OF EXPECTATIONS OF MY SELF.
I FELT THAT IF IM FORTY AND IM NOT A MANAGER OR DIRECTOR OR HAVE MY OEN BUSINESS OR NOT A SUPERSTAR...OLD SUPERSTAR HAHAHA OK PRODUCER OR SOME SHIT. MY LIFE IS WATSED! I FAILED IN MY LIFEE!!

I MUST MUST! IF NOT ITS NO POINT!
IM NEVER SATISFIED WITH DESK JOBS CONTINUOUS STUFF THAT MAKES ONE SATISFIED WITH PAY.

LIKE

I MUST SUCCEED IN LIFE! LIKE I GOT IN COUNCIL! SUCCEEDED!
GOT IN JC! SUCCEDED!
GOT MY OLVL PTS..12 SUCCEEDDED!
BE IN LOG! SUCCEEDED! YES..MY PLAN WAS TO BE MORE INVOLVED IN GOD.
BALNCED 3 CCAS! SUCCEEDED!
SING WELL! SUCCEEDED.
EVERY AUDITION I MADE IT THRU SUCCEEDED!
EVERY FRIEND I MAKE SUCCEEDED! I TREASURE FRIENDS OK. SO BEING MY FRIEND MEANS..IM SO HAPPY.
SETTING UP PIMP MY SHOE! SUCCEEDED!
DRAWING WELL SUCCEEDED!
PLAY THE GUITAR! ALMOST SUCCEEDED!

BUT LIKE ALVLS! I CANT SUCCEED IN THAT! I HATE IT I HATE IT! LIKE WHY! WHY! WHY!!!!
AIODHOSAHDOISAHDHSADHSAIFHSAF
RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
WHY DOES IT FEEEL SO HORRIBLE!!!
I HATE IT. CAN I JUST PON!
STUDYING STUDYING I CANT STUDY...THEN WHY DID I EVEN GET 12 PTS THAT MAKE ME THINK I WAS SMART WHEN IM NOT! LIKE WTH. WHYYYYYY
IM TRYING TO STUDY..I STUDY..I CANT STUDY AS HARD AS LING..BUT SURE I KNOW I STUDY HARD..ITS THE HARDEST I HAVE STUDIED! AND LIKE I KNOW PPLE WHO STUDY LESS HARD YET ARE SMART! LIKE WHY!

CANT I JUST WORK ON MY TALENTS AND SUCCEED THRU LIFE THAT WAY!
WHY..............
ACTUALLY I CAN.
BUT WHY.
WHY MUST THE TEST CALLED ALVLS DETERMINE HOW PPLE JUDGE U!
WHY! IS MY IQ TEST ALWAYS LIKE 140 139..THEY SAY IM ABOVE AVE BUT IT DUN SHOW NOW DO IT!!! SO SO SO DUMB.
MIGHT AS WELL TELL ME I HAVE LIKE 100 OR SOMETHING.









CAN U TELL ME.
WHY IS ALVLS SO HARD..WHY ARE WE TAKING IT. DO U THINK U CAN BE A DOCTOR? OR A MEDICAL PRACTIONER? OR A LAWER. IF U CAN THEN DUH!! DO U WANNA BE AN ENGINEER??? OK LAH IF U WANT! BUT I DONT WANT DONT WANT. CANT IMAGINE MYSELF DOING THAT.

I NEED A JOB WHERE I EARN MONEY FROM MY CREATIONS. CREATION OF ARTWORK, MUSIC, CREATIVITY, OR EVEN BUSINESS..






AND ALVLS IS GG TO SPOIL ALL THAT.



SO I MUST WORK HARD.
SO THEY WILL JUDGE ME WELL.
OVERALL.


BUT ITS SO HARD. WHEN U DONT KNOW WHO UR COMPETING AGAINST IN THE ROUTE I CHOOSE.
IF I GET GOOD GRADES..I WILL BE LIKE..U MEAN I COULD DO THAT? OK BUT IM NOT GG TO USE IT.
IF I GET BAD GRADES..I WILL BE LIKE. OK I EXPECTED IT...JUST ACCEPT IT. ITS MY FAULT. WHAT CAN U DO NOW..


I DONT WANNA BE A FRIGGIN DOCTOR. OR ANYTHING THAT INVOLVES ME GG UNI.
I WAS THINKING OF COMMUNICATION STUDIES..BUT MY GP SUCKS..SOMETHING I DISCOVEED FROM IN JC..WHEN ALL THESE WHILE MY SEC SCH TEACHERS SHOULD HAVE SAID..DENISE DO EXXPOSITORY..NOT NARRATIVE..ITS A WASTE OF TIME..EVEN IF U GET A1 THE SKILLS CANT HELP U IN JC UNLESS U WANNA BE AN AUTHOR.

YEP.

I DONT WANT PHOTOGRAPHY.
ITS THE CAMERA.. I HELPING THE CAMERA TAKE IT.
I WANNA DRAW. COS A PENCIL CAN ONLY LIKE MAKE A SPLOGE IF I DONT HOLD IT.


I NEED A PURPOSE IN LIFE.


PLEASE DO NOT QUOTE ME HERE.

IM SELFISH..
cant help it now can i at this point of time..when u dont know what u want... u just want everything....

so i want to get good grades..and this and that and that and this and..
i really wanted to blog all this out and not keep in inside.
so i did it.














and i wanna say..all those who feel like crap due to the As...i know it sucks like shit. Sigapore is one of the most stressed countries in the world. be have to bear with it.
and tml.
we will smile.

Hur Hur.
12:02 AM